Thursday, February 27, 2014

The Beauty of a Woman BlogFest III



This post is part of August McLaughlin’s Beauty of a Woman blogfest. She suggested writing an encouraging letter to your least favorite body part. Her blog and other entries can be found at http://augustmclaughlin.wordpress.com.  

not me
Dearest Loathsome Midsection of Mine,


You crept up on me so stealthily that I hardly recognize you. I can’t say that I like you very much, if the truth be told, but I’m sure you really don’t care. You’ve changed, and I don’t like the transformation. Years ago, you were practically unnoticeable when I unveiled you in only a bikini top, cut-offs and flip flops during summertime and wasn’t embarrassed. Perhaps that was simply adolescent naivete of someone fooling herself.


So many things in my life are different now. Age and slower metabolism is taking its toll. Bad habits have ingrained themselves, no matter how innocuous they seemed at first. Yes - I know I need to give up sugar, pasta and Diet Coke. Bagels are not kind to me. Chocolate is not my friend, regardless of how good it tastes at that moment.


Don’t even talk to me about the gym, damn you!


You honestly deserve some credit. You held my baby while his body and mind developed, while my “advanced maternal age,” as they called it, did me no favors. My son was nestled safely within my body while he waited to face the world, and his is the greatest gift of my life.  


While I owe you thanks for accomplishing that herculean task, I’m still fighting against you. A metamorphosis took place after the doctor performed a c-section and later a hysterectomy. It’s not his fault, though, because hormone changes (or the absence thereof) necessitate lifestyle changes. Knowing that now doesn’t make me fit in clothes any more comfortably until I do more about it. I need to be healthy enough to see as much of my son’s life as possible.


That’s why I go to yoga class even when I don’t feel like it. I glare at you in the mirrored wall while I try to stifle all the negative self-talk going on in my head. Giving you the stink eye does no good. It’s funny how I feel so much better afterward, although my brain played tricks on me and said I could skip a day because I was too tired or had something else to do. Becoming even more active could bring about the weight loss I want.


Ultimately, the way you look is not the sum total of who I am. You are a part of my physical self but not who I am as a person, a woman, a mother. My family and friends see the real me, not just the size 6 I used to be or the size 10-going-on-12 I am now. My stomach, waist and hips do not determine my beauty or my worth.


How I live and how I love are what make me beautiful. So I’ll continue to try to convince myself of that fact and not suffer over days long gone. Funny, I don’t remember if I was happier back when I looked different. I can only worry about being happy now, and you can’t keep me from it.


Sincerely,


Me


P.S. I just ate a fun-size Butterfinger and loved every second of it. 
  

(image via collectivewizdom.com)

August encourages us all to share our thoughts on beauty, and comments are welcome below. How do you define beauty? What makes you feel beautiful? Any thoughts to share on this year’s fest overall?

14 comments:

  1. My midsection is one of my more problematic areas. No matter how many crunches or ab-rolls I do, I just can't seem to get rid of that college fluff. But, like you, I don't allow it to identify me. Mathair and I loved this post, Katy, and the unbridled tone of it. BTW, I ate a King Size Butterfinger while reading it and my tummy thanks me. LOL

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    1. I think the aging process is against us! But it's so much better than the alternative, eh? Thanks for reading!

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  2. I love this post, Katy. I could send it to my own mid-section! Love the poignant part about your son. That's beautiful. Now as to that photo, it says, "not me," and I'm wondering if someone sneaked up on me and snapped that and sent it to you for this post! JK! I know it's not me, but it sure looks like it!

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    1. Thanks, Lyn! Dont' you just hate that darn muffin top? It sneaked up on both of us! I'm glad you stopped by the blog.

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  3. I was cheering for you and grinning because you're so right! One part does not summarize or define who you are...unless you allow it. You obviously don't. I'll see you that Butterfinger and raise you a Ghirardelli dark chocolate square. ;-)

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    1. The fight to ignore the inner critic is an every-day process. I love me some dark chocolate, too! Thanks for reading!

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  4. Like you, I'm not at "peace" with my mid-section (truthfully, I never was). But there are some amazing things it has done for me over the years...and yes, I've grown to appreciate that part of me more as time passes. Especially when my son comes up and hugs me, telling me I'm "the best cuddler in the whole wide world"....

    A fun-sized Butterfinger sounds like a great way to celebrate yourself. Enjoy, Katy.

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    1. Unfortunately, I have some gene patterns to fight against as far as the mid-section goes. It's so difficult not to be hard on myself and dread what I could look like one day, but all we can do is try to exercise and not obsess on it. Glad you stopped by, Eden!

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  5. Thank you for this funny and touching letter to a body part pointing out that we really are more than a single part (and even more than the sum of our parts). I especially appreciated your thoughts about how your body supported growing your son.

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    1. Giving us the boy is truly the best thing my body has ever done, so I try to be grateful and remember what's most important. Thanks for visiting my blog, Audrey!

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  6. I could use this post on my entire body. Love this: "How I live and how I love are what make me beautiful." Now that's a statement to remember!

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    1. Thanks, Marcia! I find the concept of getting back to a "pre-baby body" quite laughable. Glad you stopped by the blog. :)

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  7. Love this, Katy! That's about everything I want to say to my "midsection," too. I'm blaming on menopause the fact that I weight about 15 pounds more than when I got married 20 years ago (not the fact that I eat to much and don't exercise enough). My former-size-8-now-size-12 body is slinking too close to a 14 for my taste. But I love your uplifting philosophy! I'll have to remember it!

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